My Birth Story: Three Very Different Labors, One Lasting Passion

Before becoming a surrogate, I had three incredible pregnancies and births that completely shaped the way I view childbirth.

I'm a mom to three amazing kids—Natalie, Leila, and Elijah—and each of them taught me something different about my body, birth, and the incredible strength women have.

One thing all three pregnancies had in common was how smoothly they went. I was fortunate to have healthy, uncomplicated pregnancies with only a little fatigue and minimal nausea. I know every pregnancy is different, and I never take that for granted. Those experiences helped me realize that pregnancy was something my body handled really well.

When I was pregnant with Natalie, I made the decision to have an unmedicated birth.

It wasn't a last-minute decision—I spent months educating myself about the physiology of labor, different comfort techniques, and the importance of mindset. I learned that fear creates tension, and tension can make labor more difficult. The more I understood what my body was doing during birth, the more confident I became that I could trust the process.

When labor started, I stayed home as long as I could. I labored standing, swaying through contractions, and spent time on my hands and knees—whatever felt right in the moment. I waited until my contractions followed the 5-1-1 rule: five minutes apart, lasting one minute each, for at least an hour before heading to the hospital.

Everything was progressing beautifully until it came time to push.

The nurses and doctor quickly realized Natalie was coming out with one arm raised over her head. They immediately had me turn onto my back in the lithotomy position so they could safely help deliver her. Thankfully, everything turned out perfectly, and she was born healthy.

The moment she was placed in my arms, I felt something I can only describe as empowerment. Giving birth without medication wasn't about proving anything—it was about trusting my body. It was one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.

When I became pregnant with Leila, I never questioned whether I'd go unmedicated again.

Her labor was wonderfully straightforward... maybe even a little too straightforward!

At one point, I was told I was only six centimeters dilated. Barely a minute later, my body started pushing on its own. Things progressed so quickly that my partner was still asleep until he heard me calmly announce that the baby was crowning.

Needless to say, everyone woke up very quickly after that.

Leila's birth reminded me just how unpredictable labor can be. Sometimes birth follows the timeline everyone expects—and sometimes babies have plans of their own.

Then came Elijah.

His birth wasn't difficult because of labor itself—it was difficult because of the environment.

I've learned that during active labor, I become very quiet and calm. I don't scream or panic, and because of that, the hospital staff assumed I wasn't very far along. Instead of checking my cervix, they had me wait in the waiting room.

I remember sitting there watching women who were arriving for scheduled inductions get called back before me.

The longer I waited, the more frustrated I became. I knew my body well enough to know I was in active labor, and I could actually feel my labor slowing down because I no longer felt safe or heard. Looking back, it reinforced something I deeply believe: a woman's environment matters during labor.

Thankfully, my partner advocated for me. He knocked on the triage door and insisted they check me because he believed I was about to have the baby.

When they finally examined me, they announced I was "9.5 centimeters." Honestly, I'm pretty sure I was already fully dilated.

About 45 minutes later, Elijah was born.

Each of my births looked different, but they all had one thing in common: they strengthened my trust in my body.

Those experiences are a huge part of why I chose to become a surrogate.

After three healthy pregnancies and positive birth experiences, I knew my family was complete—but I also knew I genuinely loved pregnancy and childbirth. Surrogacy gives me the opportunity to use those experiences to help another family grow. Every birth has taught me patience, resilience, and the importance of advocating for yourself. As I begin this surrogacy journey, I carry those lessons with me, and I'm excited to use them to help bring another beautiful life into the world.

Looking back, I don't just remember three birthdays—I remember three moments that changed me forever. They gave me confidence in my body, appreciation for the birth process, and ultimately led me to the decision to become a surrogate. I can't wait to see where this next chapter takes me.